Some people have no problems being confident in themselves and their abilities. They can strut their stuff without a second thought. They are seemingly successful, beautiful, strong people, whose drive to succeed never falters. Unfortunately, these people are few and far between.
Many of us suffer from a lack of self-confidence. It is human nature to be more critical of ourselves than we are of other people. Many of us also fear becoming narcissistic or self-absorbed. Contrary to what you might believe, it is possible to be more confident in oneself, without becoming stuck-up. The key to preventing overconfidence is humility. If you're worried about becoming narcissistic, then you've probably got enough humility already. Now all you need is a little more confidence.
Proving to yourself that you're competent can greatly boost your self-esteem and confidence. You can do this by performing one task every day that makes you feel as if you've accomplished something. You needn't be good at it, nor must it be something big. Completing a simple crossword puzzle can be all it takes. Accomplishment is one of the most important tools for fostering competence.
Positive Self Talk
Utilizing positive self talk is a popular technique these days, and it can be very effective. Repeating over and over again to yourself phrases such as, "I am confident," or "I am a worthwhile person," can have a positive impact on your self-image, and, in turn, increase your self-confidence.
Stopping Negative Self Talk
Do you ever catch yourself saying, "Ah, I suck at life," or "You're so stupid! Why'd you do that?" These phrases do nothing but bring us down. They aren't helpful nor are they going to assist in motivation. Instead, they will merely detract from any self-confidence you might have. Try to catch yourself when you see that you're using these statements, and replace them with positive self talk.
Don't Take Constructive Criticism Personally
I know I'm often guilty of this. When someone gives you a suggestion as to how you can improve your performance, try not to take it personally. Rather, take it as it is―a suggestion as to how you can improve your performance. It's not an attack on you as a person. In fact, constructive criticism can help you learn how to be better at what you do, so that you can feel more competent and accomplished.
Write Down Positive Attributes
Try and think of all the things you like about yourself. Now, make a list. When you're feeling down on yourself, take that list out and read it. This might seem difficult, but once you get going with your list, you'll find it's really quite easy. Here's a quick sample of some things you can write about yourself:
- I've got a good sense of humor.
- I have great taste in movies.
- My hair looks great.
- I studied abroad in college, and not everyone is able to do that.
- People like me.
Make Positive Changes
Is there something you don't like about yourself that you can change? There are some things that get us down that are fixable, so that we can make ourselves better people. For example, if you feel you weigh too much, try eating healthier and exercising, so you can feel better about your body. If you feel that you're too shy, read up on assertiveness, and practice various techniques for becoming more assertive. If you have the determination to do it, you can change yourself for the better. You'll feel more competent and confident that way.